THINGS THAT DON'T WORK in china:
1. "let's use our INDOOR voices."
2. "why don't we fix it right the first time."
3. "no, really, i DO wear enough clothes. it's a virus. V-I-R-U-S."
4. "honking really loses it's shock factor when you NEVER stop."
5. "is your nicotine level need so high that even a full elevator won't stop you from lighting up?"
6. "diapers only work when you change them."
7. "change is good."
8. "if you stand in the rain too long, you WILL melt." wait. that one does work.
9. "hey, i have an idea. if we wait until everyone gets OFF the bus, we'll have more room to get ON."
10. "saying hello AFTER you've WALKED PAST me will only get you the rear view of me flipping you off."
